From the singer better-known for the TV theme, White Horses, a fast-paced beat-girl song with a cynical edge about living in a dreary place where �nothing very much ever happens�. Surely one of the few uses of �Etc etc� as part of a chorus.

Okay, I'm going to summarize the story as best as I can.

Van Morrison's first recording contract as a solo artist was with a small label called Bang, owned by a man named Bert Berns. Among Bang's hits were "I Want Candy" by the Strangeloves, "Hang On Sloopy" by the McCoys, "Cherry Cherry" by Neil Diamond, and of course "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison.

Bang released Morrison's first album, "Blowin' Your Mind," in 1967. The thing is, Morrison had nothing to do with it. He wanted out of his contract. Berns died in December of that year, but Bang (now run by Berns's wife Ilene) still wanted ten songs from Van. He gave 'em 31.

The Bang Contractuals, as these sessions have come to be known, can be split into three categories: throwaways ("Twist and Shake," "Stomp and Scream"), cynical commentary ("The Big Royalty Check," "Blow in Your Nose" [a play on "Blowin' Your Mind]), and the just plain bizarre.

"Ring Worm" is a member of the third group. First of all, Morrison doesn't sing the lyrics, he speaks them. Second, the lyrics are:

I can see by the look on your face... that you've got ring worm.
I'm very sorry, but... I have to tell you that... you've got... ring worm...
It's a very common disease...
Actually, you're very lucky to have... ring worm, because you may have... had something else.

Finally, after the lyrics comes the most bizarre "singing" I've ever heard. I can't even describe it. You'll have to hear it for yourself. I will say this: if you're familiar with Van's more commercial works, you will be dumbfounded.

Of course, we all know the rest of the story: later in 1968, Morrison signed to Warner Bros., recorded "Astral Weeks," and became a legend. I have friends, however, that believe the Bang Contractuals to be his best album.

The material shouldn't be too hard to find: since its first release (apparently, by a small Portuguese label in 1992), the Bang Contractuals have been released over and over, always as a two-disc set with the more "legitimate" Bang material ("Brown Eyed Girl," etc.) Look for titles such as "The Complete Bang Sessions," "Payin' Dues," and (ugh) "Brown Eyed Beginnings."

An amazing trippy piece of social commentary, from their genius concept LP. The opening track, and it goes all over the place with this completely mad arrangement by Chad Stuart, and produced by Gary Usher (of "Pet Sounds" fame). The track seems to pertain to mortality, and the sad truth of time and the forgotten... It sets the tone for the whole album, which seems inspired by atmosphere of the time, when singles were exchanged for huge concept pieces, more likely due to the success of "Sgt. Peppers" and the like, but taking a much more delightfully cynical view! A sometimes overlooked part of the britpop puzzle, Chad and Jeremy are full of surprises.

"Destination Unknown" sounds the least dated of all of Missing Persons' hits, most likely because it was their most melodically satisfying song. The fact that it's also Dale Bozzio's least mannered vocal performance, with none of her trademark hiccups, helps considerably as well. Her helium-pitched voice ? Dale Bozzio sang like a new wave Betty Boop ? keeps this song firmly in the Missing Persons tradition, but the low-key backing vocals by her male bandmates on the chorus are a nice touch. The lyrics are typically lightweight, your basic high school-level musings on alienation by someone who has just learned the word "existential" but is unclear about what it actually means, but Ken Scott's light-handed production and nice touches like the staccato programmed drum fills on the chorus make it pleasant on the ear regardless.
(AMG)

I love the song because the orchestra background is simply marvelous. The lyrics fit so well and knowing that this was a product of John Rzeznik's awakening from his writer's block, I'm a proud bearer of the name same as the title of this song.

A must-hear for those who are cynically in-love.

Honestly, I really like this one. I've done a lot of thinking as to the Max Martin style (ex-poodle rocker Max is Britney's songwriter and is basically responsible for the pop zeitgeist - he also does 5ive, NSYNC, Backstreet, even Bon Jovi these days), and believe you me, there is a pretty cynical formula here - verse, bridge, chorus, completely different verse, identical bridge and chorus, breakdown, then chorus to finish. Often this is pretty bad - NSYNC's its gonna be me is the nadir - but in this one it works really well - the verses are slinky, the chorus a classic pop one and basically the whole idea of oops! is pretty funny. I can't pretend I listen to it that often but I enjoy it when I do.